Parents always seem to be feeling some form of stress, even if they have nothing in particular to be worried about. Caring for another human being so completely is a huge responsibility, and this idea alone is enough to put pressure on anyone; there doesn’t have to be one specific situation or event that makes things even more stressful. The problem is that this stress can make parents short-tempered, and many moms and dads will shout at their kids without even realizing that they were about to raise their voice. Guilt then follows, and the children can become extremely confused.
It’s far better for parents to tackle things as calmly as possible, and this means they will need to practice being a more relaxed and chilled out kind of parent. It is far from easy, but the sooner you start, the more happy times you will have with your kids. Here are some ways to become a calmer parent.
Are You Stressed?
If you want to stop being so stressed and become a calmer person in general and parent in particular, you need to understand what it is that causes you stress in the first place. When you know the signs, and you can identify what it is that stresses you out the most, you can deal with it much more easily.
Some signs of stress to watch out for include raised blood pressure. It can make you feel dizzy and cause your heart rate to rise, plus you’ll feel extremely tense. Another sign is yelling suddenly, or even talking a lot more than usual (often in a louder tone). You’ll feel irritable and have a serious lack of patience. You will jump to conclusions because of a lack of judgment so the kids could be blamed for something that they had no part in at all. When you’re in tune with your body and can look out for these warning signs of stress, you can step away from the situation and re-assess before you say or do something you later regret.
Step Away
Stress happens to people for a variety of different reasons. Financial worries often contribute to feelings of stress, but that’s not the only reason; lack of time, feeling underprepared, or even specific reasons such as changing jobs or moving home can all be behind why you feel so stressed out. Whatever the reason, even if you’re just overtired and need a rest, it’s essential to take some time out when you need it.
It doesn’t need to be anything long-term or major; a few minutes can often be enough to give you a chance to think about the situation you’re in and calm yourself down, coming up with a solution rather than simply becoming angry about it. You could go to your room and have a lie-down, or perhaps listen to some calming music or read a chapter of a book. Maybe a long, hot, bubbly bath will help. You can continue the conversation when you return in a much more peaceful frame of mind, and that will benefit everyone.
Find The Answers
Once you have managed to take yourself away from the situation and then calm yourself enough to go back and work things out, you’ll need to find the answers. It is much more easily done when you’re thinking clearly. Take your time and assess the situation fully before deciding what to do; work out what it is that is causing you the most stress and deal with that first. You might, for example, be feeling totally unprepared for the upcoming school vacation in which case you can make sure you have a plan for how to entertain the kids, and if you’re worried about keeping them healthy, you can check out this website for advice and medication too.
Perhaps it’s the fact that the mornings before school are always so rushed. In which case, prepare everything the evening before. That includes lunches and putting out the kids’ clothes (and maybe even your own) in advance to shave some time off the morning routine. If it’s bedtime that causes the most stress you can work out a rewards system that gets the children into bed and keeps them there unless it’s absolutely necessary to get up again. Do whatever it takes, within reasons because you don’t want to spoil the children, to make life easier and stress-free for everyone.
Meditate
Learning how to meditate can truly help with de-stressing when you feel overwhelmed, and you’re in danger of getting angry with everyone for no real reason. Meditation allows the entire body, and your mind, to relax, giving your home a more positive atmosphere. You can even meditate with the whole family, and many experts suggest that children who meditate can do better at school and are generally more happy in life, which can only be a good thing.
There are a number of different meditation techniques to choose from, and some will work better for you than others, which is why it’s good to tackle a few of them before deciding on whether or not to continue with your meditation practice. One easy way to begin is to imagine you’re in an elevator at the top of a tall building. Breathe in and out three times slowly, then pretend to press the button for the first floor. Imagine you’re descending and continue to do your breathing exercises as you go. This technique is called ‘elevator breathing’ and can really help you to feel calmer in a short period.
Laugh
Can you remember when you last really laughed out loud with pure joy? That’s not the same as just feeling a little amused or smiling. Really laughing is good for you and everyone should do more of it; it reduces stress immeasurably. When you are stressed, you will have a lot of tension in your face, and this can cause headaches (even migraines for those who are susceptible) and jaw ache. A good laugh can reduce that tension making you feel instantly better for it. Therefore, always look for the fun in things, even if you don’t think you’ll enjoy it. Going into situations with a more positive mindset will help you much more than a negative one ever will.
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